Lina Inverse and the World of Cliché Wizardry
by Behold the Void
Summary: Yes, it's a Slayers and Harry Potter crossover. Yes, it is likely an abomination, but I'm trying to at least make it not suck. All canon guaranteed to be blasted out of the water along with the giant squid. Possible mild profanity.
1. Chapter 1

Lina Inverse and the World of Cliché Wizardry

Opening Notes: OK, so this is either going to be amazing or a trainwreck. I'm going to do my best to ensure that it's the former moreso than the latter, but I make no promises. This is an idea spawned from the head of a friend of mine, a friend who possesses a mind I choose not to contemplate, lest I drive my sanity to the far reaches of this universe.

Anyway, so yes. This is a Slayers/Harry Potter crossover fanfiction. Again, I have no idea what kind of drugs inspired it, but I assure you that my undertaking this project is only a result of my lack of resistance to constant IM prodding.

Yes, I am weak.

My standard practice with fanfiction is one of two things, make a story that can fit within the canon (i.e. my Bleach Potluck story or the ill-fated original character Bleach story which may be updated someday but probably won't be), or do something so patently absurd that I don't even mind blowing canon out of the water (i.e. my Natural 20 story, which is in severe need of a rewrite anyway).

Obviously, this story will be in the latter of the two categories. I am taking complete liberties with the Harry Potter continuity, to a point where canon (and the giant squid) will be blown clean out of the water. And for those who care, I'm going to be gutting events from the 5th book. And gutting them good, let me tell you.

You have been warned.

And now, let us begin.

Chapter 1: Never Trust a Mazoku to Know What He's Doing. Or Talking About.

"Xellos!"

A very much enraged Lina Inverse ran vainly after the swiftly floating man, her red hair and cloak billowing in the breeze. Around her were the quickly condensing walls of a cavern, daylight streaming in through the quickly vanishing entrance she had entered not too long before.

"Damn it, come back here!"

Lagging somewhat behind the sprightly young sorceress was her constant traveling companion, the blond and jellyfish-brained Gourry Gabriev.

"Lina!" he whined. "I'm hungry!"

Lina groaned and kept running. As she groaned, her stomach answered with its own complaints.

After the defeat of Phibrizzo in an almost (quite literally) cataclysmic battle, Lina decided that she deserved something she had been denied for quite some time.

Lina, with her traveling companions the aforementioned Gourry Gabriev, Zelgadis Greywods, and Amelia Wil Tesla Seyruun returned to the kitchen of the great cook Ashford, who was nearing completion of the much-desired Dragon Cuisine they had labored so hard to obtain the ingredients for.

However, this happy and much-awaited dish was not to be as they arrived just in time to see Xellos fleeing (or rather, floating) from the scene, several large pieces of dragon corpse on his person.

This was how Lina found herself and her companions in hot pursuit of the trickster-priest, her companions lagging behind her with varying levels of enthusiasm.

As Lina entered the cave, she knew immediately that this was no minor trick. Xellos was, as usual, up to something. Were she not so hungry, she may have even cared what he was up to. But in her current state, there was but one option, and that was to catch the mazoku and wring his scrawny little neck until he surrendered the goods.

Xellos, floating just ahead and moving only slightly faster than her, was in a reclined position with the hunks of savory dragon meat floating just above his outstretched palm.

"You're so slow, Lina-san!" he called cheerfully. "I could have eaten this all by myself hours ago and you wouldn't have been able to do a…"

He trailed off and ducked his head down as a fireball went wizzing past his head, where his nose had been located just moments before.

"Good shot!" he complimented.

"RAYWING!" Lina shouted, her voice echoing in shrill fury.

A powerful gust of wind lifted her and the rest of the group into the air and sent them spinning through the tunnels (quite literally, in the case of the hapless Gourry).

Xellos deftly wound his way through as the tunnels grew narrower and more twisting. Moving left and right, he took them through a massive maze of interconnected tunnels, ducking and bobbing the occasional fireball whenever Lina's anger boiled over into murderous rage.

After what must have been hours, he suddenly came to a stop within a huge room buried deep underground.

Lina and the others followed soon after. Seeing Xellos floating lazily above them, Lina, without thinking, dismissed her spell.

The next few moments were some of the more painful moments Lina had ever experienced as the four of them tumbled into the air and began rolling along the ground, before slamming into a wall and ending in a pile of bodies. As luck (or perhaps Karma) would have it, Lina managed to land on the bottom of the pile, with the heavy stone body of Zelgadis nearly crushing her ribs. Gourry landed on top of Zel in a heap of blond hair and armor while Amelia, through quick use of her own magic, managed to land lightly on top of Gourry's back.

After several moments of furious shuffling (in which Lina screamed just about every insult and profanity she could think of at her companions), they finally managed to assemble into something of a line, facing Xellos.

"Welcome, Lina Inverse," he said, executing a mocking bow in midair. "I've been expecting you."

Smiling, Xellos raised his hand as a flaming arrow shot straight at his face. The arrow impacted with his palm and shattered into sparking embers that slowly floated to the ground, before extinguishing themselves.

Growling in frustration, Lina glanced swiftly around the room.

The room was well-lit, with torches lining the walls. Lina could feel a bit of magic about them, as if the torches were enchanted to never be extinguished. However, what most caught Lina's eye was a large pedestal in the center of the room, upon which sat a huge stone archway.

"What do you want, Xellos?" Lina growled, glaring at his smiling figure with hate-filled eyes.

Xellos laughed.

"Why Lina-san, I only require a touch of aid. There is no need to glare at me with such a venomous expression!"

Almost as if used to it, Xellos lazily floated out of the way of a large fireball, which exploded above the doorway they had entered from, blasting a large hole in the wall and causing several chunks of masonry to fall, partially blocking the door.

"My my, so temperamental," Xellos said.

"Give me back my dragon!" Lina shouted, her voice rising several octaves. "It's MINE!"

"I would be happy to return your soon-to-be meal," Xellos said, "I just need a bit of your power. You see, this gateway here leads to the Astral Plane and acts as a beacon. I simply need it charged."

Lina's eyes narrowed.

"And what exactly are you calling?" she asked archly, folding her arms over her chest.

"Oh, a bit of this, a bit of that," Xellos said evasively.

Lina glared.

"I… oh fine. If you must know, it's my… little… brother…" Xellos said, trailing off into a mumble.

"Your… what?" Lina asked, not quite believing what she'd heard.

Xellos sighed. "My little brother. Small, destructive black cyclone of mazoku death, you can't miss him the family resemblance is uncanny. Anyway, he's been learning to be a proper mazoku from Lord Ruby-Eyes, and Beastmaster wants him home to continue with some private training, so I need to get him back. Which requires a gate. Which requires a beacon. Which requires the Dragon Slave."

Lina's eyes narrowed.

"Wait, don't all you mazoku hate each other or something?" she asked archly.

"Well, sort of. But we're still CIVIL about it," Xellos said, a bit miffed. "I mean, sure officially Beastmaster feels Ruby-Eyes and just about every other powerful mazoku out there are weak pretenders to the throne, but he's really quite the pleasant conversationalist once you get to know him, and he makes an absolutely fantastic mincemeat pie. Well, humanmeat pie. But you get the idea."

"I can't believe I'm hearing this," Lina said.

"Hey, Lina," Zelgadis said, his eyes narrowing. "Do you really trust him? I mean, he's said some pretty weird stuff, but this?"

"Yeah!" Amelia chimed in. "He could be trying to invade with a whole army of mazoku!"

Lina rolled her eyes. "Are you guys sleeping? That portal's really limited. I doubt one large mazoku could even fit through it, much less an army. If opening it up will get him to leave me alone and give me back my dragon, I'm more than happy to do it."

"That's the spirit, Lina-san!" Xellos said happily. "Now, please, direct your spell through the portal, you must fire it through the precise center in order to send the appropriate summons."

"Yeah yeah yeah, I know," Lina said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "Just stand back and let me get this over with."

Knowing full well what was to come, everyone (including Xellos) gathered in a tight cluster behind Lina. Sighing, Lina closed her eyes, her voice deepening and a glowing ball of energy forming in her hands as she began to incant the spell.

_"__Darkness beyond twilight, crimson beyond blood that flows, buried in the flow of time is where your power grows. I pledge myself to conquer all the foes who stand in front of this mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy hand. Let the fools who stand before us be destroyed by the power you and I possess. Dragon Slave!_

The spell shot forth from her hands, engulfing the center of archway but not passing through.

"You've done it!" Xellos said happily.

His joy, however, was short-lived, as something that somehow nobody was expecting happened.

The portal exploded.

Closing Notes: So, I had had some kind of idea of making this at least somewhat serious later on in the story. I think any opportunity of that is going out the window. Well, I'll probably get a few more chapters out at any rate. Drop me a line and tell me what you think.


	2. Chapter 2

Lina Inverse and the World of Cliché Wizardry

Note: Said friend who demanded this story also happens to be picky. There was a point I had to clarify for her, so I figured I should do so for the rest of you, in case there were any questions.

Normally, Mazoku dwell within the astral plane. The reference to Xellos's brother may have seemed a bit odd – why would a mazoku visiting another mazoku need a gate to be opened from the human world in order to get back?

The answer lies in the fact that Shabranigdo was sealed away, thus, with a few creative liberties, I deemed that he exists in a plane separate but coterminous to the prime material plane, Lina's world. However, there is no access to the astral plane from that plane (to give it access to the astral would be extraordinarily stupid, it'd let Shabranigdo contact and command his minions with greater ease and possibly even break out). The gate Lina was opening is considered to be a small rift that allows a smaller Mazoku, i.e. Xellos's brother to slip through. Once back on the prime material, Xellos's brother would be able to easily shift back into the astral, as Mazoku tend to do.

Anyway, onward.

Chapter 2: As soon as we get back I'm going to kick your scrawny ass so hard it'll circumvent the astral before coming back so I can kick it more!

"There again, progress for progress's sake must be discouraged…"

As the squat, toad-like woman was speaking, she was suddenly interrupted by an ear-splitting cry.

"XELLOS IF WE LIVE I'M GOING TO MURDER YOU!"

The air was filled with a loud crackling sound as a huge, swirling black vortex formed above the table at which the staff of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry sat. The vortex coalesced into five shapes, who immediately fell onto the tables. Most of the staff had by this point vacated their chairs in shock and moved away from the vortex, their wands extended. However, the speaker had chosen not to, proudly and defiantly standing directly under the vortex as it formed, even looking irritated that it had dared interrupt her speech.

This didn't work out too well for her, as within an instant she found herself squashed under the combined weight of five people, one of whom weighed enough to easily serve as the anchor for a good-sized vessel.

The room exploded into an uproar as the teachers encircled the group, their wands pointed. A man with a long white beard and spectacles raised his own wand and unleashed a loud explosion, which caused everyone in the room to stop and turn their eyes to him.

"Order, please," he said in a strong yet gentle voice. "I will have order."

Lina, who had somehow managed to end up on the top of the pile (sitting on Xellos, who hadn't quite made it to the top) looked up at the old man.

"Who the hell are you?" she asked impudently.

Several of the teachers, their wands still trained on the group of newcomers gasped, but the man merely smiled.

"I am Dumbledore, the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, where you find yourselves. Who might you be, young lady?"

"I'm Lina Inverse, the beautiful genius sorceress!" Lina said, casually flipping her long red hair with one hand.

She stood, causing Xellos to breathe a sigh of relief.

"I've never heard of Hogwarts before," she said, "and I know most of the magical schools in Saillune. Could it be… are we on another continent?"

Dumbledore frowned.

"I have not heard of this 'Saillune' you speak of. We are on the British Isles at the moment, but the name of 'Saillune' does not appear on any of our maps, and we know the geography of our world quite well, I can assure you."

Lina waved her hand dismissively. "You wouldn't have heard of us anyway. Until just recently, the Mazoku Barrier contained our country from the outside world. I was actually planning on traveling to the outer continents, but I had some business to attend to first."

As she said this, as if suddenly remembering, she turned to Xellos.

"Xellos," She said slowly and deliberately. "Do you know what I'm about to do to you?"

Xellos stood and floated back, a frightened expression on his face. Several of the students gasped as he did this, although Lina didn't notice, so intent was she on her prey."

"I waited six months to taste Dragon Cuisine!" she said, her voice rising and becoming more shrill.

"I'm sorry, Lina-san!" Xellos said. "I didn't mean for this to happen!"

"FIREBALL!" Lina shouted as she unleashed a ball of flame that shot towards Xellos, exploding as it came in contact with him. Several people screamed in terror and chaos once again erupted in the room as the teachers immediately leveled their wands at Lina.

"QUIET!" Dumbledore shouted, again releasing a loud crack from his wand. Again, the room silenced, although the teachers kept their wands leveled at the fiery young woman.

"Miss Inverse," he began. "How did you do that?"

"What, my fireball?" she asked. "It's just a basic shaman spell. Can't you guys do it?"

"Spells with such destructive and chaotic natures are considered to be the domain of the dark arts," Dumbledore said gravely.

"Lina knows tons of dark arts!" Gourry chimed in helpfully, having extricated himself from the pile.

"Lina-san is a master of Black Magic!" Amelia agreed helpfully. "She can cast spells that bring even dragons to their knees!"

At this point, Zelgadis had shrunk into a corner, drawing his hood over his face. He knew immediately that something strange was going on, the clothing the children wore was odd and he had never in his life seen an institution such as this. When Gourry and Amelia decided to try to "help," Zel could only sigh and bury his face in his hands. The situation, he mentally predicted, was about to disintegrate even more.

Zelgadis could not have been more right.

"STUPEFY!" the toad woman, finally freed from the pile, shouted.

The jet of red light struck Lina like a thunderbolt. Her eyes widened as her body stiffened and she began to slowly fall to the ground.

"LINA!" Gourry shouted, drawing his sword and running at the woman.

His heavy footfalls caused the woman to turn on her feet. Without thinking, she unleashed another jet of red light that struck Gourry square in the chest.

Gourry gasped, stopping dead in his tracks for a moment before shaking it off and continuing his charge.

"Expelliarmus!"

Two blue jets of light flew from Dumbledore's wand and the wand of an older woman with a rather severe bun and an even more severe expression. Gourry's sword flew out of his grasp as he staggered backwards slightly, landing easily in Dumbledore's left hand. The toad-faced woman's wand did the same, landing in the hand of the older lady.

"Thank you, Minerva," Dumbledore said.

"My sword!" Gourry shouted plantatively.

"Your weapon is a danger to those at this school," Dumbledore said. "For the time being I have confiscated it. I do apologize for Professor Umbridge's attack on your companion, but I assure you that she is unharmed, merely stunned."

"Yes sir," Gourry said in a voice much like that of a small schoolboy who had just been scolded.

"Now then, I would like to calmly and rationally discuss these occurrences with all of you in my private quarters. Minerva, please see to the children. Severus, come with me.

As he spoke, Lina had recovered enough from Umbridge's spell to stand. She stood slowly, her eyes blazing with rage.

"I'm going to kill you!" she said, her eyes crackling with rage. "NOBODY does that to Lina Inverse and gets away with it."

At this point, Zelgadis felt it was time to step in. Without even pausing to think, he appeared at Lina's side, his demon-enhanced speed allowing him to move within the blink of an eye.

"Lina," he said through his mask, grabbing her arm and forcing eye contact.

"There's something strange here. Let's just go quietly for now, I want to find out more about where we are."

Lina appeared to be about to protest, but finally shrugged resignedly.

"Fine," she said, raising her arms as if in surrender. "We'll come quietly, for now."

"Thank you," Dumbledore said politely. "It won't take us long. Please, follow me."

And with that, the headmaster and the greasy-haired man turned and walked from the Great Hall, followed by the five unexpected guests. As they left, the students began to chatter wildly amongst themselves as Minerva and the other teachers attempted to restore order.

All but forgotten, Professor Umbridge stood to the side, her wand in hand after Minerva had hastily returned it before taking charge of the situation. Her eyes were flinty and narrow as she seethed with barely restrained rage. Interrupted AND ignored. She would not stand for this.


	3. Chapter 3

Lina Inverse and the World of Cliché Wizardry

Notes: Yeah, it's been awhile. My friend is very catlike, and she's fairly persistent in bugging me about writing new chapters now that we've all returned to school. When she pokes me enough, another chapter will come out. That's the agreement I have for writing this at all. It's a means to remove an annoyance, if only for a short time.

Rather vicious cycle, no?

Dumbledore's robes trailed behind him, swishing softly against the stone floors of Hogwarts. Lina followed with Amelia, Gourry, Zelgadis, and Xellos in tow. Oddly enough, Xellos was walking behind the rest of them instead of floating as usual, and his expression was somewhat troubled.

Leading them through the halls, Dumbledore brought them before a statue of a gargoyle.

"Chocolate Frog," he said in a soft voice. At his words, the gargoyle slowly and ponderously moved to the side as a staircase emerged from behind it.

"Come in," he said kindly as he ascended the staircase.

Lina followed cautiously after him, and as they entered the room. It was a strange, circular room; one she'd never dreamed existed. The pictures all moved in their frames, depicting a lot of generally older people. As she entered, several of them looked at her strangely, some even making comments about her and her demeanor (comments, she noted, were generally insulting or critical. She made a mental note to incinerate them later). There was a huge desk in the center, the surface polished to the point where it shined in the light of the sun that streamed in from the wide windows and standing upon clawed feet. Mounted on the wall behind the desk was a ratty old hat (Lina vaguely remembered that she'd seen one just like it in the room they'd teleported into. She wasn't sure how it had gotten back to the office but assumed magic was involved) and a sword with a ruby-encrusted hilt contained in a glass case.

Dumbledore swept into the room and took a seat at the high-backed chair that stood behind the desk.

"Now then, please make yourself comfortable," Dumbledore said. "I realize it is customary to offer seats for one's guests, but I am afraid my office is ill-equipped for so many visitors."

"It's fine," Lina said with a dismissive wave of her hand.

"First off," Dumbledore said, "I am familiar with just about any noteworthy magical community on earth. The fact that Saillune does not appear in my memory at all is somewhat troubling, especially if it is, as you implied, a large continent."

Lina's eyes narrowed slightly.

"Earth?" she whispered softly, fixing Dumbledore with an intense stare.

"Indeed," Dumbledore said, gesturing to a large globe. "There is no continent on this planet with the name of Saillune."

Lina walked over to the globe, studying it intensely.

"Does this world exist within any greater planescape?" she asked, her gaze still extremely intense.

"It does not," Dumbledore said. "Although several of our wizards have theorized that there are other planes of existence upon which our world can connect, although such gates are likely found beyond the stars and without our reach. We know of no such gates on this planet."

Lina paused for a moment to swallow the information. Zelgadis' face was dark, he obviously also understood the implications of what the man had just said. Amelia and Gourry were puzzled, and Xellos, leaning against the wall near the entrance to the office, looked extremely troubled.

"Xellos…" Lina hissed, whirling around to face the mazoku, who blanched.

"Lina-san, I am sorry, I didn't think that something like this would happen!" Xellos protested, somewhat feebly. "But please, you must listen to me!"

"DYNAST BRASS!" Lina shouted, raising her hand.

Lightning flared from her fingers, before flickering out and dying feebly, much to her surprise.

"WHAT!?" Lina shouted shrilly, causing Dumbledore to wince.

"I wanted to explain," Xellos said feebly.

"Quiet!" Lina snapped. "Zel."

"Yes?"

"What's going on?"

"Haven't you figured it out by now?" he asked, his voice somewhat exasperated.

"We're completely cut off from our own world."

"I know that!" Lina snapped. "Why didn't my spell work? My fireball worked fine!"

Zelgadis sighed. "I know you're smarter than this, Lina. THINK! We are cut off from our own world. This world is not governed by the same deities as ours. The spell you were trying to cast draws its power from Dynast Grauscherra, who does not, on this plane, exist."

"That doesn't make sense though!" Lina shot back. "The universe was created from the sea of chaos and is governed over by the Lord of Nightmares! Why is this world any different!?"

"If I may interject," Dumbledore said calmly. However, his words were most certainly not a request, something Lina recognized immediately.

"Sure," she said grudgingly, in an attempt to salvage her pride.

"In this world, our deity is decidedly… less defined. In our lore there is a singular God, but we've no concrete evidence of the being's existence. Our creation stories say that our world was spun from nothing, as opposed to a 'sea of chaos,' as your lore seems to suggest. It would appear that our worlds are completely unconnected, or at the very least have a very different progenitor."

"Also," Xellos said, his voice grave. "I cannot feel the Astral Plane around me, nor can I feel the power of the mazoku about me."

Lina's gaze turned to Xellos, her expression still sharp and intense.

"Nothing? Nothing at all?"

"Nothing," Xellos said gravely, his expression far more serious than they had ever seen (or ever wanted to see). "While I retain a considerable amount of my power, I do not know if that power will replenish as it normally does. As I cannot sense the astral plane, many of my abilities are barred from me, and it is entirely possible that in this world I will cease to exist if I stay for too long."

Lina pursed her lips.

"I suppose this is pretty bad if you're that concerned," she said.

"If I may, you and your companions are… human are you not?" Dumbledore asked, eyeing Zelgadis and Xellos cautiously.

Seeing his gaze, Zelgadis drew his hood over his face more, as if embarrassed.

"For the most part," Lina said. "I am, as are these two," she said, waving her hand at Gourry, who was asleep, and Amelia, who had the look of a student who had no idea what her teacher was talking about but was too frightened to ask.

"And you, Mr. Zel?" Dumbledore asked Zelgadis, unsure of how to address him.

"Zelgadis," he said. "Zelgadis Graywords. I used to be human, but I was transformed into a chimera by… we'll call him my grandfather."

Dumbledore nodded. "A sad occurrence indeed," he said, shaking his head.

"And this guy is Xellos," Lina said. "He's a mazoku and a general troublemaker. He's the one who got us into this mess in the first place."

"What, exactly, is a mazoku?" Dumbledore asked, his expression unchanging.

"A mazoku is… well, I guess demon is a good word for them," Lina said.

"Lina-san! I object to such defamation!" Xellos said weakly, his normal personality showing once more.

"I see…" Dumbledore said, frowning.

"Well, we have quite a predicament. You see, you caused quite the uproar at my school. News spreads rapidly amongst Hogwarts, and I am sure that the rumors are already flying right now. Furthermore, with no place to go in this world, I am afraid I cannot allow you to leave the premise."

"Can't allow us?" Lina asked, arching her brow. Dumbledore sighed.

"Please do not make this difficult, Ms. Inverse. I dislike issuing commands like this, but our situation is somewhat different from how yours appears to be. For example, we wizards and witches are not actually common knowledge in this world."

"Seriously?" Lina asked incredulously. "How can you NOT be? Magical power is a force that can't be denied in our world!"

"We have our reasons. Suffice to say, ours is a hidden world, and a complex one at that. News of your arrival can have many implications, none of which are good. You see, Ms. Inverse, you have come at a bad time. We are involved in a war, although the Minister of Magic refuses to admit it. If news of your arrival were to reach the rest of the wizarding world, we'd have people lining up to take you away. Something I imagine you would find inconvenient."

"I guess," Lina said grumpily, not wanting to admit the old man had a point.

"This is my offer. I will put you all up in my school. You will be sorted into a house and integrated into our magical community. You will be expected to attend classes, of course, but you may find them interesting. Your magic appears to be quite a bit different than ours, and you should be able to wield our own magic with little difficulty. During this time, we will aid you in finding a way to return to your world. I may even be able to find a way to return your companion to his original form."

As Dumbledore said this, Zelgadis' ears perked up.

"Really?" he asked, his voice quivering with barely contained excitement. His hands were shaking as he said this, his eyes suddenly filled with a hope that he had not felt in quite some time.

"I can promise nothing, unfortunately, but transfiguration is among our abilities. There may be a cure."

"That sounds OK, I guess," Lina said. "But what are you going to do with this lunkhead?" she asked, kicking Gourry sharply in the stomache. He groaned and mumbled in his sleep, before rolling over as if nothing had happened.

"He couldn't cast a spell to save his life!"

Dumbledore examined Gourry for a moment, deep in thought. "He seems like a nice enough fellow. I'll send him to live with our groundskeeper, Hagrid. The two will probably get along. Is that acceptable, Ms. Inverse?"

Lina looked Dumbledore straight in the eyes, her expression grim as she studied him. Dumbledore met her gaze, and eventually she was forced to turn away, unable to stand against his deep blue eyes.

"Yeah, sure, that's fine," she said.

"Excellent," Dumbledore said. "Now, if you've no objections, I'd like to start the sorting process immediately."

"Sorting?" Lina asked as Dumbledore retrieved the tattered hat from the wall.

"You'll see," Dumbledore said with a smile. "Now please, put this on."


	4. Chapter 4

Lina Inverse and the World of Cliché Wizardry

Chapter 4

Notes: Let's pretend its somewhere remotely close to Christmas, just for a bit. I promised my friend I'd give her some updates for Christmas, but she had to get online and remind me to write it.

Well, now she did. So here you go. Maybe if I throw enough of these out there, she'll get bored and leave me alone.

And maybe even unchain me from my computer.

Also, do recall that neither Amelia, Xellos, or Gourry have mentioned their last names to Dumbledore, nor has he pressed the matter, given the circumstances. That is why he will call some of them by their first names, although it's not something he tends to do.

Lina stared at the tattered hat dubiously, her hand running unconsciously through her wealth of red hair.

"You want me to put that greasy old thing on my head?" she asked, arching her brow dangerously.

"Yes, please," Dumbledore said, his blue eyes twinkling merrily.

Lina looked like she was about to say something until a rather hard stone foot slammed onto her boot. Her expression turned into a grimace of pain as she shot Zelgadis a glare, one he returned with a sharp look that clearly said "just do it!"

Making a sweeping gesture across her neck and giving Zelgadis a meaningful final glance, Lina grabbed the hat from Dumbledore's hands and put it on her head.

"My my, you're a devious child," a hoarse voice croaked into her ear.

"Naturally," Lina murmured back.

"You're not the most courageous though, and definitely a bit bratty. It seems like you only stand up for what you know needs to be done when backed into a wall, which isn't terribly admirable," the hat replied.

"I could end you with a flick of my finger," Lina hissed, her expression darkening.

"SLYTHERIN!"

Dumbledore exchanged a sidelong glance with the stone-faced Professor Snape, who had been standing in the corner, almost invisible in his unobtrusiveness. Snape appeared rather unsettled at the idea of his newest house member.

"Miss Amelia, if you would step forward please," Dumbledore said kindly.

Amelia walked forward tentatively, and Dumbledore carefully placed the hat on her head.

"You're a rather brash young lady aren't you?" the hat asked. Amelia nearly jumped. "Definitely the courageous sort, although you could probably stand to learn a bit of restraint. Definitely… GRYFFINDOR!"

Dumbledore removed the hat and Amelia slid away, looking at the hat with mistrust. Dumbledore beckoned Zelgadis forward next.

Zelgadis accepted the hat with ease, completely unconcerned.

"You've got quite the mind, haven't you? Intelligent, crafty and creative, definitely a good mind to work with. You aren't too afraid of standing up for yourself either? Tough, tough decision. However, right now you thirst for knowledge. Knowledge to fix yourself. Thus, it can only be… RAVENCLAW!"

Zelgadis walked back to where he was standing as Dumbledore removed the hat and gestured Xellos forward. Before he even got within five feet of the hat, however, its mouth opened wide.

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Thank you, old friend," Dumbledore said to the hat as he placed it back on the desk.

"So what the hell was that about?" Lina asked impatiently.

"There are four dormitories within Hogwarts," Dumbledore explained. "They are akin to a student's second family while they are here. You will be integrated into the houses you've been sorted into. Most classes will be taken with members of the same house, although a few classes will be integrated with other houses. At dinner, you will eat with your house, and your actions will earn or lose points for your house, which can hinder or aid your house in achieving the house cup at the end of the year."

Lina waved her hand dismissively.

"I don't really care about that," she said. "Anyway, are we done here?"

"One moment," Dumbledore said. "Severus, would you please go fetch Minerva and Professor Flitwick?"

"Of course, Headmaster," Snape said in a slightly chilled voice as he left.

Within a few minutes, Snape returned with the older woman who had drawn her wand earlier and an extremely short, balding older man close behind him.

"Thank you for coming, my friends," Dumbledore said. "I've just sorted these newcomers into their respective houses. Minerva, would you please take Miss Amelia to the Gryffindor dormitories? After that, take Mr. Gourry to Hagrid. Professor Flitwick, Mr. Graywards to the Ravenclaw dormitories. Severus, please take Miss Inverse and Mr. Xellos to the Slytherin dormitories. After that, I would like all of you to return here, we have much to discuss."

"Yes Headmaster," the three said, nearly in unison. As they turned to leave, however, Gourry suddenly stopped them.

"Wait, why aren't I going with Lina?"

"You don't have any magic," Dumbledore replied kindly. "I'm sending you to live with our Groundskeeper, he'll give you a place to stay and you'll be able to do work that you should find more suited to your skills."

"But I'm supposed to stay with Lina!" Gourry protested. "She'll get in trouble without me!"

Dumbledore pursed his lips, but before he could say anything Lina, whose face had momentarily turned a brighter shade of red than her hair, interjected.

"Gourry just go with them," she snapped, her voice slightly shrill.

"But Lina…" Gourry began before she cut him off, her eyes flashing.

"Just do what they say! I'll be fine without you!" She paused for a minute, before speaking again, her voice softer.

"It'll be fine, don't worry about it. Go meet this Hagrid guy, I'll see you later."

"If you say so, Lina," Gourry said dubiously.

Dumbledore returned to his desk and leaned into the chair with a sigh.

"Well, now that that's taken care of, off with you. We'll discuss these matters later, Miss Inverse, I imagine you and your companions are quite weary and would like to sleep."

"Don't think we won't," Lina snarled as the five were led off by their prospective professors.

In spite of himself, Dumbledore chuckled. "I look forward to it, Miss Inverse," he said to the now-empty room.


End file.
